8iRWeiXjcKj9kUz5Tebo4_k_FtY Life with Two Special Needs Children: February 2012

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Happy 10th Birthday, Sweet Caleb!

Not sure what happened, but I had scheduled this to post yesterday, because I was doing an exercise as part of our church small group study of a media fast and for whatever reason it didn't post.  So, here it is, a little late, but still wishing my big boy a very happy birthday!!!!

Ten years ago, one of the most beautiful and precious little boys came into this world and made Tony and I parents for the very first time through the miracle of adoption.  Every year on Caleb's birthday I am more thankful for the selfless decision that Caleb's birthmother made in choosing adoption for the sweet little boy she was carrying instead of the alternative.

I remember sitting at my desk at work, with my cell phone in my pocket, working away when my cell phone rang.  On the other end of the phone was a friend of Caleb's birthmother telling me that she was at the hospital in labor.  I called Tony, told my boss and my co-workers and our HR department that we had just received the call and I needed to leave.   I called our counselor and she told us to start getting ready to travel.  Tony and I met at home we began the frantic packing process and calling to change our plane tickets that we had booked for a couple of days later to fly out the very next day.  Later that afternoon, about 4:45, we received the phone call that our son was born.  We were so excited.  I could hardly sleep that night!

The next day we began the long flight to California.  I called the hospital and talked to our son's birthmom before we got on the plane.  She told us that the nurses said it would be okay for us to come to the hospital as soon as we got into town, even though it would not be until about 10 p.m. that we would even land at the airport.  We did go straight to the hospital and this is the first time I was able to see our son, Caleb Alexander:

I will never forget setting eyes on him the first time!

Caleb's birthmom, Nova, was in the NICU waiting for us to get there.  When I first walked in after getting washed up, she handed him to me and said, "Here is your son."


Caleb spent five days in the hospital and then was discharged to us.  His birthmother was resolved in her decision and signed all the necessary papers when she was asked to.  We even had to do it a second time due to the fact that there was some mental health questions and we found out that she needed to have a psychological exam performed before actually signing the papers.  So we had to hurry and get all of that accomplished. We were told that it could take weeks to get the necessary ICPC paperwork approved, which meant we had to stay in California until that happened.  It so happened, that because our home study would have expired while we were in California and would need to get it updated as soon as possible, we were actually able to receive a conditional approval and leave California to go home to North Carolina within a week of Caleb being discharged from the hospital.

Things have definitely not always been easy with Caleb, but we know - without a doubt - that God chose us to be Caleb's parents.

Happy 10th birthday, sweet Caleb!!  

Mommy and Daddy love you very much!!!!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Ten Years Ago - On Pins and Needles

Ten years ago, Tony and I were anxiously awaiting that phone call every in the process-adoptive parents wait for - whether the birthmother you are matched with is in labor.

It was a very stressful time for us because Caleb's birthmother in the six weeks that we were in contact with her moved three times without telling us until after the fact and only called when she needed something.  It was so difficult being so far away (we were in North Carolina - she was in California) and not knowing what was going on.

Based on our previous failed adoption experience, we (well, mostly me) jumped to the conclusion that she was changing her mind!  I remember spending a long time one day on the phone with our counselor at our adoption agency telling her that I couldn't go on, I wanted to unmatch because of the lack of contact and the fact that she moved so much and didn't tell us or call us until she needed something.  Our counselor calmed me down that day and told me to be patient, that we only had a short period of time to know what was going to happen.

I am so thankful that our counselor calmed my nerves!

Monday, February 20, 2012

What Do You Get When Your Sensory System is Out of Whack?!?!?!

Tony and I have dealt with sensory issues with Caleb since he was a very young child.  His sensory issues have ranged from very sensitive to sun, not liking water, especially bath, he didn't like to wear certain clothes, tags bothered him, he didn't like to get his nails trimmed or his hair cut (well, he still doesn't like his hair being cut!), the sound of the vacuum cleaner, plus he needed a lot of deep input by running into walls or falling HARD on the floor, just to name a few!  We did over a year of occupational therapy with him and was told at the end that she had taken him as far as he was going to go.  Well, when we started hippotherapy last Spring, we learned that wasn't true, because he's made some more progress in his sensory areas.

When Steven was placed with us, we were brought into another set of sensory issues.  A lot of Steven's sensory issues surround textures, but he also sought deep pressure input by laying on his back and kicking his legs hard into the floor.

However, a new type of sensory input surfaced last November, where Steven will put his head on the floor and sit on the floor (or in his crib/bed) and rock back and forth.  When Steven puts his head on the floor and rocks, he will give himself a rug burn - and doesn't even cry because he doesn't feel the pain (which is another one of his sensory issues).  But this is what you get when your sensory system is out of whack:

We have started weekly occupational therapy and Steven will also start hippotherapy in March, so we're hopeful that we can get his sensory system back in line!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

New Post on Private Blog

I posted on the other blog.  If you would like to view it, please e-mail me your e-mail address and I will be sure to add you.


Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Another Blog

I have decided to start another blog that will be a place for me to more privately keep my thoughts about our daily struggles.  I will still update here as well, but for more sensitive things, it will be on the other blog.  If you want to read it, please let me know and send me a message with your e-mail and I'll send you the information.